Single Woman Plight - Bank Holidays

For those of us who work, we all know how incredibly precious a bank holiday weekend is.

That one (or two) days off which don't eat into our holiday allowance for the year, that let you have a long weekend and a bit of a chance to decompress and have some fun.

Mine started so well, had a lovely girly night on Thursday with some dvd's, some vino and a curry.  Yesterday I just chilled out in anticipation of going out today with a friend.

The rant that follows is a fairly common one for me.  I'm a single girl in a social circle composed almost entirely of couples.  The few single people I do know are women a fair bit older than me and consequently we go out to have a chat and a laugh rather than to meet people. 

A significant part of Single Woman Plight (SWP) in the couple-crowd is that you never see your friends without their significant other.  Obviusly for the coupled friend this is the way they get to compromise and see both people at the same time.  I'm cool with that.  For the single friend, its being reminded that you're single and not having time alone with your friend to chat about things really important to you because you're aware their partner is there.

Today, at about 12:30pm I text the friend with whom I'd made plans to see if we were still going to do something.  I got a reply saying he felt like crap and could we pass on it today.  Okay, thats fine.  You can't help being ill.  But could you have told me sooner than lunchtime so I could have made alternative plans?

Consequently, I spent most of my day wallowing in bed/self pity wondering how one goes about expanding their social circle to avoid situations such as this one.  It'd be nice to always have a back up in place so if one person lets you down you have someone else to see.  I suppose its a little bit like dating two people at the same time.

Another element of SWP is that you never seem to get to meet other single people.  I'm not really looking to date at the moment, but meeting another person in the same boat might be nice!  I think its actually harder to meet new platonic friends than it is to get a date, particularly as the internet is rife with websites trying to pair you off.

Apologies for the whinge, loyal readers.  I'm just p.o'd that I've wasted an entire day of my life in bed alternating between episodes of Ed, Edd and Eddy and The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron:Boy Genius.  I'm not knockin either programme, I love both, I'd just rather have done something a little more social/constructive with my day.

Comments

[clarissa]

Some of us couples think we're single ... we're the funnest ever to hang out w/.

[Beth]

Clarissa - I think I could handle that, people who still have their independence rather than having become half of a whole.

[Before Sunrise]

I suffer from the same plight, and I agree, it becomes increasingly difficult to meet people who are in the same boat. Shame I'm not in England any more, we could hang out :)

[KennethSF]

Hey, I adore your new hairdo. I think it makes you look more spunky. I'm sorry to hear about your single woman plight. I can't believe someone with your winsome smile is having a hard time meeting other single folks. How about asking your couple friends to bring along some of their single friends the next time you go out together?

[Travis Erwin]

I'm surprised your friends aren't trying to fix you up with someone all the time. That seems to go on in my circle a lot.

[peach]

ugh, I used to hate easter or other bank holidays when I didn't have a bf. I used to take the chance to detox by having the first day drinking only water and fruit juice, the second eating fruit and drinking water and fruit juice, then the third eating fruit and veg and drinking water and fruit juice. By the first night back to work I would be shitting myself and feeling faint and would get arseholed on just half a lager...

[Ing]

If you're looking for a diverting & daft kids programme to while away loungey days in bed - 'Pokoyo' comes highly recommended. Great animation and a Stephen Fry voiceover. Genius.

[Heidi]

AH I'm actually surprised that someone else has done that! (Sitting in bed pouting over messed up plans with not much to replace them with) Tsk, tsk. Being single is amazingly fun sometimes, but other times... not so much!

One thing I think helps is to (I know this sounds sooo cheesy) get involved with volunteer work--you'd be surprised how many cool single people are doing that. I've made good single friends that way recently ;)

Btw I have your blog bookmarked, it's a favorite.

[Emz]

Hey
Just wanted to say I'm in the exact same boat as you. I'm on the look out for some new female friends single or otherwise, I would offer my services but I think we are at opposite ends of the country unfortunately. :(

[Clare]

I'm totally with you on this Beth. I went home to the parents for bank holiday weekend and my friend said she had to wait to find out what her boyfriend was doing before she could tell me if we could meet up or not. I never heard from her and I've given up.
Maybe look at joining a club or something similar like I do with my choir. You meet lots of new people that way and get to socialise afterwards.

[David]

Too bad I'm not in England. I totally would've grabbed a pillow and joined you in cartoon watching. That to me, is one of the best things about being single. You can watch immature television for hours in your pajamas and not have to justify your programming to anyone.

[Deb]

Love your new photo, Beth!