...Think, Think, Think...: Any Red Dward Fans in the House?

I'm a bit of a fan. Of the first 5 series anyway, it went a bit rubbish after that.

My blog post stems from a thought I had whilst watching an episode called Dimension Jump from series 4.

In this episode, we see Ace Rimmer for the first time. He's another version of Arnold Rimmer from a parallel dimension.

The theory they were toying with was that for every decision you make, every outcome is lived out in different dimensions. It got me wondering about all the what-ifs in my life.

Of course, I can't change the past but I do wonder where I'd be now if I'd made different choices. I guess we all wonder that sometimes.

It made me hope that in one of those dimensions, that one of the Me's had made all the perfect choices and was really happy. I'm a bit envious of this parallel me. She'd have all the good qualities that I don't - patience and compassion and tolerance. She might be slower to wound than I am. But maybe less clever, or not as funny. More girly or sporty or placid.

But then it sort of dawns on me...I could be that parallel me couldn't I? Couldn't I?

My dad was cleaning out some cupboards recently and found one of my school reports. My teacher from June 1992 said this:

Beth is a confident, friendly girl who always tries her best in school. She has a mature attitude to work and is self-motivated and independent. She could profitably work on her attitude towards less able members of the class in order to achieve a more supportive rather than judgemental attitude. She has made steady and pleasing progress this year.

That was 1992. Almost 18 years ago. I was 10.

My dad thought it was hilarious, as did my line manager and the owner of the company I work for.

Do you know why? Because take the word "school" out of there and replace it with "work" and "class" with "the office" and literally NOTHING has changed.

At school it was the less able people. In grown-up life, its the less driven, less passionate, less responsible people I struggle with. People who can't apologise for mistakes but give you a laundry list of excuses. People who don't give it 100%. Seriously, go big or go home. If you want a job you don't give a fuck about do not work in a sales organisation people. Tesco's are usually hiring and I hear the checkout isn't that strenuous.

So yeah. Maybe I could change. Or maybe its just who I am. Who I'm meant to be.

And I shouldn't fucking apologise for that.